Everybody has secrets. In my latest novel, True Believers, the hero, Taelen Jessit is keeping a dangerous one. He can see his 'gods' in their ethereal state. Ordinarily that would be a pretty sweet deal, except for the fact that men with such a gift are summarily castrated. (Talk about a rough health care system.)
My heroine has a secret too. She's a near-immortal, a Nephilim who would be exterminated on sight if anyone knew of her existence.
Even Bubba, the Artificial Intelligence (which Ronda seemed to love) is keeping a secret. He's not just a super smart computer. Bubba has become sentient, and is beginning to understand the concept of free will. Can you imagine a computer with free will running our defense systems?
True Believers is a story full of secrets. I've discovered to my horror that life indeed imitates fiction. My very own husband had been holding out on me. I was stunned and a little nervous when Greg made his wicked confession.
Was it another woman? A secret bank account? A criminal record?
Ha! Nothing so mundane.
He wants to be a Zombie.
I thought he was kidding at first. But the clues were in front of me the whole time.
• His routine is mind-numbingly dull. Get up. Shower. Go to work. Eat. Sleep. (Sound familiar?) If that's not Zombie behavior, I don't know what is.
• He craves meat. Okay, so it's not human flesh. But I got a little worried once while he watched me get undressed. I swear that was the same look he wore when he eyed the pot roast I pulled out of the oven. Coincidence? I don't know.
• Lack of communication skills. He grunts a lot. What's worse is that I am beginning to understand his vocabulary of grunts.
• The Zombie Shuffle. Well, he limps. Does that count?
Being a good wife, I listened patiently (while I polished the shotgun) as he explained why he wanted to be a Zombie.
"For the TV show", he says. "The Walking Dead. There's a contest where you can win a walk-on role in The Walking Dead."
"You want to be on TV?"
"Sure! That would be so cool."
I breathed a sigh of relief knowing I wasn't going to find my brain half eaten on any given morning. But it was far worse than I thought. Greg didn't want to be a real Zombie. He wants to be an actor.
Hmm…now where the heck did I put that shotgun?
Your turn: Have you ever had a super secret desire to do something crazy? Should I be worried about Greg? I'll admit, I think he has the chops to be a great Zombie. He even comes with his very own Zombie Dog.
***
How could I not hold a mini-giveaway after a revelation like that? Leave me a comment, and if you'd like to win a copy of True Believers, add your email address. I will choose one winner from the comments on November 22nd.
Maria Zannini's latest release is a science fiction romance called TRUE BELIEVERS.
Mix one cynical immortal and one true believer and throw them into the biggest alien-hunt the world has never known. Rachel Cruz is a Nephilim masquerading as an archeologist and she's stuck with an alien who believes she can lead him to his ancestral gods. Black Ops wants to find these gods too. They want them dead.
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Blog Tour Contest! Every time you leave a comment, tweet or mention "Maria Zannini" anywhere with a link to my blog, your name goes in the hat for a chance to win a Texas sized prize. Go here for more information.
STOP THE PRESSES! Round Two in Writing With The Stars has begun! Maria has made it to the second round of the Kensington Contest. She would be oh so grateful if you could vote for her novel, Mistress Of The Stone. (Maria is the one with the very cute puppy.) Every vote, tweet and nudge is hugely appreciated. Thanks, everyone!
not goiing to say anything about Zombies and actors, really! But maybe about men having the advantage on being zombies over us.... I can see myself getting in trouble already, so I;ll stop now.
ReplyDeleteFunny post though!
vickykerr@sbcglobal.net
good luck Maria with writing with the stars - I voted for you.
ReplyDeleteI can so relate to human beings being close to the meaning of Zombies - I think we all are at some point in our lives especially the ones who have to work for a living and raise kids at the same time.
BTW, I am a huge fan so I will be looking forward to reading your next book.
Great post, Maria, as usual. I have to admit when I saw husband and secret in the same sentence I thought it was something horrible. Zombies aren’t scary, I married one too.
ReplyDeleteI would love to be entered in your giveaway for a free book since I don’t allow myself to buy books until December (that’s the only way I could make a dent in my already existing 400+ book collection).
ca4ac@yahoo.com
LOL. Sounds like your husband and I would get on well - I love zombies too.
ReplyDeleteGreat post!
As I am not a huge fan of Zombies, even though have to admit "Amanda Feral" character written by Mark Henry is funny, think your idea of looking for the shotgun still holds merit... Maybe a little "rock salt" on the non limping side might cure this particular aspiration to become one of "The Walking Dead"! Have to admit there are worse secrets Greg could have had!
ReplyDeletejackie >_<
Another fabulous interview! I must admit though, I also demonstrate worrying zombie behaviour - especially with that get up, shower, work, eat, sleep routine. How to un-zombie-fy it though, that's the question. How about get up, shower, tap-dance, work, eat, sleep?
ReplyDeleteI don´t now if this giveaway is international. I hope so.
ReplyDeleteAnyway, before this post, your book looked very interesting, but if you write like this, I really want to read it now!
I couldn't stop of laughing, and now I believe that my boyfriend is a zombie too (the real one, no the actor kind), he looks at me as if I was a delicious steak, and he eats a lot of meat! :D
martasder[at]gmail[dot]com
Thanks for stopping by, everyone!
ReplyDeleteVictoria: Welcome!
Ronda: Thank you. I laugh because I've feel I've turned you to the dark side of SFR. LOL.
Lia: You married a zombie too? Sounds like they ought to make a movie about that. Glad I'm not alone.
Ellie: I'd be willing to let him go for an extended visit. I can't get any writing done when he's here. But he's good company and very funny.
Jackie: Go to AMC and watch the first episode. It really is good. My husband made me a believer.
Jayne: A zombie that tap dances? We need to write to AMC and give them some suggestions for future shows. :grin:
ReplyDeleteI can see you in costume already.
Kasumi: Definitely international. And yes, I talk like this all the time. On my blog, in my books and even in my sleep. I wonder if that's why I always find a pillow over my face every morning.
That zombie husband! Thanks for visiting!
Being a walk-on zombie would be awesome! I'd spend all day in a make-up trailer for that!
ReplyDeleteZombies never die because they're already dead. An actor is better.
ReplyDeleteFirst he gives a terrific interview, now he's a wannabe zombie/actor. This hubby of yours is extraordinary. :-)
ReplyDeleteI thin it would be fun to be an extra on a movie set or tv program. Not seen the show but your husband should enter the sweepstakes.
ReplyDeleteBarbara: I guess it would be kinda cool to say you were a zombie on a hit tv show.
ReplyDeleteDru: You're right, of course. An actor is less gooey than a zombie.
Linda: LOL. He's unique. I'll give him that.
Lindseye: I'm sure he'll have a lot of competition, but it would be fun. I'm wishing him luck.
How wonderful to aspire to being a zombie actor having lived a mundane life grunting like a Neanderthal! I love it. Now what would my deep dark desire be I wonder?
ReplyDeletePossibly to have some kind of magical or super power. I've always wanted to be able to make people's litter stick to them. When they chuck their trash on the street, it would magnetically stick to their coat tails or jump back into their car. Imagine what would happen if they let their doggie foul the pavement- Tee hee! Pure gold. :O)
Madeleine: I think you've struck on the most unique super power ever. Drives me nuts when I see litter fly out of the backs of pick up trucks. PS I got your email entry. Thanks for entering.
ReplyDeleteThe winner for a copy of True Believers: Lia Bal.
ReplyDeleteCongrats to Lia, and thanks to everyone else for entering.